10 Year Reunions, Turning 29 and Fresh Air!

Well...as much as the next woman, I hate the idea of aging...I have to say that this month has been a double buster of the "you-are-getting-old-woman" voice in my head...For beginners, its my birthday month, and I have reached that year where most women choose to stay at for the rest of their life...29..well wait, before you start calling me 29, i technically have 8 more days of being 28...and believe me, I am hanging onto them like that cat hanging from the tree limb with the catchy slogan HANG IN THERE! that some genius seems to thinks relate to highschoolers...Anyways, I am off track..(Must be the age). I am honestly curious to see whether crisis' are genetic...I remember my mom telling me she had a breakdown at 30 and called her mom bawling her eyes out asking if this was how life felt...LOL..I laughed then..Now I think I may have one coming my way...Lets not forget that I had a mini breakdown two years ago when I was walking around telling my coworkers that I was about the be 30, then was so graciously saved by my good friend who informed me I was actually only going to be 28..(Thanks Brooke)...Needless to say, turning another year older brings alot of deep feelings to the surface...For one, I have started to analyze EVERYTHING in my life...If I dont get fit before I turn 30...then its all down hill...If I dont have another child before i am 30, then its all down hill...If I dont start College and take it seriously, then its all down hill...If I don't start removing my makeup EVERY night before bed and slathering my face with anti age moisturizer, then its (EVERYONE SAY IT WITH ME) ITS ALL DOWN HILL! uggg....Someone give me a martini! The second blow this month, was my TEN YEAR HIGH SCHOOL REUNION...I stressed and fretted over this event for the last 6 months...Worried for what I do not know...Then as it pulled closer, I became so overtly excited to see all my close friends...Friends whom I have never been able to replace..Friends who I may not talk to for months, or years, but we pick upright where we left off...It was so great to be around friends who were the same age, who shared the same griefs over family, husbands, kids and aging...To be able to act like we were still seniors in highschool...to break out extremely embarrassing photos and stories (thanks again Brooke) and to just laugh...I laughed so much during those few days, I swear I got a jumpstart on my fantasy six pack...The best part of this month was my trip to Montana...I got to see family...My brothers, dad and stepmom...To hang out and relax..Plus they all got to see Jaden..Which is always a plus for them...I think my favorite part of being with my family, is going to my brother Mikes property and camping out for the night...I felt like I had lost touch with my Montanan roots by traveling around so much..I had not camped in YEARS...The fresh air, the trees, the cold night air & a camp fire...I wanted Jaden to experience what Montana is about...Its not about video games, trips to Walmart where you spend money on useless items out of boredom...Montana is about hard work..rough hands, dirty work clothes (dont believe me...Look at any guys hands from Montana)...its about trucks, boots and, huge fish & deer, and  FRESH AIR...To be able to see my Dad sit down around a campfire was such a treat...My whole life, my Dad has been working..always some project at hand, some chore to do..something to weld, something to fix..something to move...SO when he sat down in a chair, chatted it up around a campfire...I felt great...Leaving Montana was really bittersweet...I missed my husband, my bed, my cats...But on the plane I already missed many things about MOntana... my heart hurts that I cannot move my family TO Montana...Someday I hope to combine all the elements of my life that I love into one place...and I hope that place is Montana...

So now that I am back in Mississippi...I face my 29th Birthday in a week...My 20 year reunion, which I know will come ALL too fast, and a variety of other life milestones, but in the words of a very wise and very missed friend...Another day 6 ft above the ground sure beats the alternative! Now where is my Martini?

Just Checking in...

I just wanted to check in...I haven't blogged in a minute because I really havent been inspired to...But I enjoy it so I wanted my followers to know that I havent forgotten about you all! Here are some random fill in questions that I borrowed from Ms. Doris! :)

1.Have you and your spouse agreed to live in separate locations (a geographical bachelor tour) knowing that the short-term inconvenience would have long-term benefits for your family? How did it work for you?  Malik and I have never agreed to live in separate locations simply because it has never been something that has been an real option. We know that he could possibly have to do a one year tour unaccompanied and we have discussed that. We have also had discussions about him volunteering for tour just so that we can have a base of preference when its over with. Untimately, I think that being seperated like that as a couple and family really is hard to do. I know people that have done it, survived and gone on with their lives none the worse for wear, but I also know those whose family has fallen apart. I think that if we were seriously considering this, the long term payoffs would have to be very substantial. However, I think alot of times that i would rather him "volunteer" for a tour and we be able to make the preparations etc than being "told" that he has to do one and not feeling like we have any control over our lives.


2. What is your favorite thing about being a MilSpouse? There are so many things that I love about being a mil spouse. I would have to say that the opportunity to move and meet so many people from different walks of life is so awesome! I have made some great friends that I can never replace and I owe that to the military taking me out of my element and plopping me in a new area. I think that being a Mil Spouse builds so much character and well roundedness inside you..


3. If you could still have your spouse/significant other and your family, but take the military life out of it…would you? I dont think i would...as hard as the military can be for us, and the amount of stress that we have dealt with in the past, I wouldnt trade it...I think we would miss out on so much more positive than negative...Like so many have said, our military lifestyle really has made us who we are as parents, partners and people,


4. What have your homecoming experiences been like after a year long tour of separation? I have not ever experienced a year long tour, but simply short TDYs and 6 month deployments. Its odd at first because you are excited to see each other, but you have to readjust alot of things. I think the military does a lot to help families cope with reintegrating members and their families. I know that its hard when you as the spouse have been taking care of everything and then all the sudden your hubby is back and your whole routine is messed up....I know the thing in particular that drove my husband nuts when he came back was that he forgot where things were located in the house like the scissors etc...

5. If you have a child(ren) why you chose their name(s)? If not, why you would name your child something? We have one son named Jaden...I actually chose the name because we could not agree on anything then in class one day a fellow student of mine said her sister had her baby and named him Jaden and I loved it...So thats what we went with...Now everybody and their sisters babies are named Jaden,Hayden,Caiden etc....But at least Jaden is spelled a bit differently than the norm JAYDEN....His middle name comes from a grandfather..My son who passed at 3 days of age was named Maximus...I love that name because to me it symbolizes strength...Thats a name that you have to live up to..You cant be a Maximus and be weak or of poor character. He also took Edward as his middle name from a grandfather.

Day 9...Music for the Moods

For Boredom...I love me some Adele...She is such a talented Lass...Great voice...music that is a little bit of everything...Love, hurts, life,  and happiness

When I am Hyped...Oh there are so many...I love me some Beyonce...very empowering..I love Pitbull...he gets me ready to shake a tail feather...I like David Guetta and all of his features with many artists like Kelly Rowland, etc. I also love me some Lil Wayne...He is crazy, weird lookin and always on something, and WAAY to gansta for me I know, but he is so dang talented...






When I am sad...There is one song that I always like to CRY my eyes out to...Literally..I put it on JUST to cry to it...And I found it by absolute mistake in a movie...I dont even know anything else by this artist! its Alright by Pilot Speed from the Movie Death Sentence...

30 dAYS OF ME...Days 7-8..Catch Up Time!

Like everyone else that I know, I am playing catch up with getting to know me...Life just gets  busy sometimes, but I hope that everyone enjoys these latest tidbits!

Day 7...A picture of something that has made the biggest impact on your life...

This is going to be a typical one but in so many ways not typical...
There are lots of people that have made HUGE impacts on my life...my mom, my husband, my best friends...but these two have impacted me the most...they have changed my life in ways that I never knew would be possible..I think differently, I act differently, my goals and dreams are different...And so much more...So meet my two babies!

This is Jaden, Bobo, Turkey, Bo Chz...My baby...I cannot believe that he will be 7 years old in just a few short weeks....It makes me sad...Jaden changed my life in many of the ways that having a child changes anyone...But I think the greatest lessons that Jaden has brought to my life, is cherishing every moment...I am like any other parent, I get side tracked, I rush, I dont fully hear everything my child is telling me...But I can tell you there is no worse feeling than that of sitting down on your couch or laying in bed at night, and realizing that you were basically ignoring what your son was talking to you about because you were too busy doing something that doesnt even hold weight against your family...Jaden makes me want to be a better person...a better mom, a better wife, a better Christian and a better friend...A Better Listener..

This is my little angel baby Maximus Edward Calhoun...He was born on September 27, 2008 . I was only 26 weeks pregnant..Max was born weighing 1lb. 10 oz, and 13 inches long (he was going to be tall just like his daddy). Max died on September 30, 2008 in my arms. Max single handedly impacted my life more than anyone I will ever know...It doesnt matter how long you know someone, because even a few moments with them can change your life forever...make you love them for a lifetime and miss them for eternity...Max taught me that modern medicine does not determine your fate...They dont know EVERYTHING....they told me that he wouldnt cry when he came out because he was too little, well he did....They also told me that he had an 80% survival rate, but he died...Max also taught me to kiss more, to squeeze and hug tighter...To cry like a baby...it really does help...He also taught me how being strong doesnt mean that nothing ever affects you, but rather it means putting one foot in front of the other day after day, even though your heart is dying and your spirit is crushed...Max also gave me the greatest gift ever...The gift of HOPE...I know I didnt realize it until he came along and then left, but a life without HOPE is nothing at all...I dont want to live my life not HOPING...not hoping that people are good essentially, that we are all here for some purpose, that love is real, that family and friends are the only thing that matter, that even when you are told no, or thats impossible, or you are too old, too ugly, too fat, too dumb, not rich enough, not important enough...when LIFE, the WORLD, tells you to give up...beats you down...You get back up because you HOPE...because you hope. Thank you Maximus...Kiss and hug more...Be foolish and HOPE with all your heart.







Day 8...Short term Goals for this month/week

My goal is to really be discplined in going to the gym and not being nilly willy about what I am eating...i have been so bad for the last few months, and I have somehow managed to not gain any weight, but its like a monkey on my shoulder...Its there and if I keep going down this path, I will be VERY unhappy...So I have been going to the gym...Which makes me feel so much better, but I really need to work on my eating habits...I know that this is probably the worst time of year to start with...With Turkey Day being in two weeks...Man...I just am starting to believe that I have a love affair with food...I love to EAT...Happy, mad, bored, sad, anxious, busy...I always have time for some food...Good food...Its dangerous but I LOVE it...And honestly, I dont think there is anything wrong with that...Is there?! I mean everyone should have a passion in life...And eating is one of them...So maybe if i can become discplined in my exercise, then I can feel better about wanting to eat my whole plate, and Jadens plate, and probably the rest of your plate...Course it doesnt help that Harvey's is now serving a Devonshire Carrot Cake...Damn!

30 Days of Me...Day 6 FAVORITE SUPERHERO

BAM...KICK...SNAP...BOOOM...

Fave super hero...Batman hands down..I know he is considered the jerk amongst superheroes, and some dont even consider him a REAL superhero because he is really just a rich man with cool toys...But darn...He is one sexy man!

PS...I have ALWAYS thought that Batman should be played by a black man! LOL

30 Days of Me Day # 5....A Picture of Somwhere I have been to

Being in the military, its so hard to compete with who has been to the coolest place...Because quite frankly, people travel alot...So we have all seen and been places that we NEVER wanted to be or that we have ALWAYS dreamed of seeing...So I had to hunt through my pics to really decide which place I wanted to give that honor to...So here it is...

This is a night shot of a street in Athens Greece...I chose Greece because it is by far one of the MOST gorgeous places that I have been...It outstrips Rome, Tuscany, Florence Milan...Paris..Yep even Paris...I think it was more the atmosphere of Athens than anything.My hubby sent me there for Valentines Day with some girlfriends, and it was AWESOME...

Anyone who has traveled in Italy or Europe period for that matter, knows that the countries are heavy with ruins and history..Greece was no exception..This is a shot of the Acropolis ...I think what intrigued me the most about Athens was that it was Rome, but Grecian..If that makes any sense...Life seemed more laid back, less frantic...And the views were breathtaking..I could literally imagine life back when philosophers lectured on marble steps and the Acropolis was the mecca of Greece...

These two are shots of what they began to find as they were digging to create their Subway system...As a result, Athens Subway is considered a Historical Site and Museum...

Picture of the Temple of Zeus...this is taken from a distance, but these pillars are like a horse...they look large from a distance, but once you get close to them, you realize just how GIANT they are...

The first Olympic Stadium...

More Ruins and Grecian Buildings...
And of course..the humorous part of our trip...

Me with a Beer...something I love no matter where in the world i am, but this one was particularly cold and frothy!

This gentleman discovered that we were Americans, and as I have so often found with Europeans etc, he proceeded to do the only thing that apparently we are famous for, which is the birthing of Michael Jackson...he shouted Greek to us, then hung his poor little doggy out of the window and screamed Michael Jackson...It made for some great entertainment,,Poor pooch...

And here is a shot of a WONDERFUL waffle that we had in a roadside Cafe..and even though the person that ordered it was VERY annoying and whiny, I thought it was AWESOME...PS Gessica if you EVER invite that person along again, I shall hang you out of the window Michael Jackson Style!

This last picture is my favorite...we literally took the off beaten path..hiked up stairs that were carved out of the mountains (along with seeing homes that were the same) and when we reached the top...this was our view..the sun was setting, the moon was becoming visible and it was quiet and gorgeous...There were homes that people had literally made out of the side of this mountain, and were still living in...the whole atmosphere was someplace that I still picture as my "tranquil spot"...I hope to return here someday with my husband in tow and take another picture from this exact spot...

If you are ever VERY rich and lingering between seeing the Pyramids or going to Greece, let me make it easy for you...GREECE...I was there during February and the weather was perfect..not too cool and not too warm...However, the summer would make for a great time to island hop and lounge in the sun...The people are friendly and quaint...But beware..the language is quite literally GREEK..Its not readable, writable or speakable unless you know what the heck is going on...i spent the majority of my time feeling like i was in a world of frats/sororities with all the crazy letters and the other part drinking beer & explaining to other Greeks that I WAS not greek,...I just have a large nose and broad face from my mom...

Arrivederci! (Cause I dont know how to say shit in Greek!)

30 Days of Me Day # 4...A Habit I Wish I Didn't Have...

Wow..this is a loaded question...If you asked my hubby this about me he would probably say, "How about them Yankees?" lol....I have a few habits that I wish I didnt have...Read on Followers, Read on...

#1. I am a pimple POPPER...its gross, disgusting and horrible for dinner conversation, but it doesnt change the fact that I pop pimples...And sometimes get excited about it...And whats worse, is I dont just pop mine...I pop Maliks, I mentally pop other peoples and I think i will have to physically restrain myself from popping jadens when he hits his teenage years...This habit is so bad on my part, that I seriously consider from time to time becoming a dermatologist or estetician who only gives facials..I had a facial once at a spa (minds OUT of the gutter people) and she came up with such a lovely way to tell me she was going to pop some black heads on my nose...She was going to perform some "extractions" so now I call myself an "extraction specialist"...I know, I know..its nasty, it takes longer for them to heal, it can scar, it can spread other pimples...Preaching to the choir people...So I just do what I normally do when I cant control myself, blame it on Malik!

#2. When looking at any pictures, I flip or scroll through them very quickly, then I ALWAYS look at them at least another 2-4 times, SLOWLY...analyzing EVERYTHING about them..what the people are doing in the background, how my hair looks or clothes, my eyebrows, other peoples eyebrows...This has only recently developed in the last 6 years, which I fully believe has led to my inability to take ANY good pictures...I spend WAAAAaaaay too much time practicing smiles etc...So if you ever take a pic of me, I will probably make a silly face so that it doesnt get as much scrutiny as my normal smile! LOL

Flying by the Seat of my Pants!

#3. Probably my most serious habit is PROCRASTINATION...that explains why I am 28 yrs old, dont have a college degree, have no IDEA what I want to be when I grow up, why I have TWO cat litter boxes instead of one, why I always scramble for birthday gifts etc., why my digital camera still has pictures on it from months ago, and I never send out Christmas cards! But you know, I have come to understand, that maybe i am too negative...too down on myself...Maybe its not Procrastination, but rather i like to FLY BY THE SEAT of my PANTS!

I once read somewhere from those people that always say popped pimples scar, standing with your legs crossed minimizes your hips and thighs in pictures, and a marker board with a calendar on it will organize your life....that your 20's are about finding yourself...discovering who you really are and becoming comfortable with it...And now in my "middle age woman" years of 28, I am finding that its not necessarily becoming comfortable with yourself (I honestly wont think I will feel that way until I am able to wear a moo moo in public and eat whatever I want everyday) but more of NOT CARING what others think...This is me people...Raw and real...I am not embarrassed about it (and most women arent after a room full of men has watched a baby come out of your crotch) and I really dont think it will change...Just please, DONT tell Malik that! :>)